Wedding RSVP wording: the card, the line and the reminder

The line says two things, by when and how. Everything else can wait for the reply itself.

• Formal: "The favour of a reply is requested by the first of August."
• Classic: "Kindly reply by 1 August."
• Relaxed: "Let us know by 1 August."
• With a link or a code: "Reply by 1 August at the link below." or "Scan to reply by 1 August."

RSVP stands for répondez s'il vous plaît, please reply, so "please RSVP" says please twice. Nobody minds, but "Kindly reply" is shorter and means the same.

A reply card has three parts: a line for the names, a way to say yes or no, and the date to send it by.

• Formal: "M______ will attend / will not attend. Kindly reply by the first of August."
• Classic: "Joyfully accepts / Regretfully declines."
• Warm: "Wouldn't miss it / Will celebrate from afar."
• Playful: "Count me in, dancing shoes packed / Sadly can't, but I'll raise a glass."

The playful pairs are where couples have the most fun. Keep the meaning unmistakable: no guest should have to wonder which box means no.

Ask per person, not per reply. "Please choose a main course for each guest: beef, sea bass, or the vegetarian risotto" gets you an order for the kitchen; "Any dietary requirements?" gets you "two veggies" and a week of follow-up.

Say how many places you have saved: "We have saved two seats for you." Ask about children only if children are invited, and then ask their ages, because a six-year-old and a sixteen-year-old are different plates and different chairs.

End with one open question: "Anything we should tell the kitchen?" catches the allergies, intolerances and the guest who cannot eat after a certain hour, without a checklist.

Online, the reply sits inside the invitation, so there is room for a sentence of welcome above it and a thank you after it.

• Above the form: "We would love to know if you can make it. It takes a minute."
• After a yes: "Thank you! We can't wait to celebrate with you."
• After a no: "We'll miss you. Thank you for letting us know."

On MyEventOS the reply is a page of the invitation itself: each guest answers for themselves and the people with them, the answers are counted in Manage guests, and the table downloads as a spreadsheet for the caterer.

Remind once, about a week before the deadline, and give a reason: the venue needs numbers, the caterer orders on Monday. People answer a real deadline faster than a nudge.

• "Hi Anna! Just checking our wedding invitation reached you. We're finalising numbers this week, could you let us know by Friday? Here's the link again."
• "We would love to know if you can join us on 12 September. Replies close on 1 August and it only takes a minute."
• "Last call for replies! The venue needs our final numbers on Monday, so if you haven't answered yet, please do."

After that, a personal call to whoever is still missing. With a reply deadline set on MyEventOS and the All-in plan, an email reminder goes once to each guest on your list who has not answered, and to the maybes who left an address; the ticks beside each name show who has opened the invitation, so your own messages go only to the people still missing.