Wedding day dos and don'ts for guests

Do

• Reply by the date on the invitation, even if the answer is no.
• Say if you have an allergy or a dietary need when you are asked.
• Read the whole invitation: the dress code, the timings, the address of the party as well as the ceremony.

Don't

• Bring a guest who was not invited. The invitation names who it is for.
• Ask to bring your children if the invitation does not name them.
• Change your answer the week before unless you truly have to.

Do

• Arrive twenty to thirty minutes early, and find your seat.
• Put your phone away if the couple have asked for an unplugged ceremony.
• Follow the order of the service, whatever it is, with respect.

Don't

• Wear white, ivory or anything that could be mistaken for a wedding dress, unless you are asked to.
• Step into the aisle for a photograph. The photographer is being paid for that.
• Arrive after the bride or groom. If you are late, wait at the back.

Do

• Sit where your place card says. Someone thought hard about it.
• Talk to the people at your table, especially the ones you do not know.
• Dance, even badly. Nothing pleases a couple more than a full floor.

Don't

• Move place cards or swap tables.
• Make a speech you were not asked to give.
• Treat the open bar as a challenge.

Do

• Use the couple's hashtag or shared album if they have one.
• Send them your best photos afterwards. They will treasure the ones the photographer missed.

Don't

• Post photos of the couple before they have posted their own.
• Share the invitation or its link publicly.

Do

• Follow the gift list if there is one, or the custom of the families: in many places money in a card is the usual gift.
• Say goodbye to the couple and thank their parents before you go.

Don't

• Bring a large boxed gift to the wedding itself. Send it ahead.
• Leave before the cake and the first dance without telling anyone.